By Brent McNamara, MA, LCADC
A Story Too Many Families Know
On January 26, 2005, my youngest brother, Kevin, died from a heroin overdose. My mother was devastated. All of us were, even though, in many ways, we had been mentally and emotionally preparing for that day for years.
Kevin began using drugs and alcohol when he was still a child. Over time, his use progressed to the point where he spent most of his adult life in prison, jail, treatment programs, halfway houses, or living on the street. He moved in and out of our lives during those years, often coming home to ask for money or a place to stay.
My mother never turned him away. She always welcomed him back, even though he often stole from her and sometimes became physically violent. Still, she let him return and gave him money whenever he asked.
The Weight Families Carry
Fast-forward to today, and my mother still blames herself for Kevin’s death. She could never say “no.” Out of fear that he would die alone on the streets, she enabled his behavior.
In the end, he died alone anyway.
Kevin had just been released from prison and found a job working on the docks in Boston. He was paid in cash for the day. On his way to the train, he bought heroin and used it in the bathroom. After time in jail, his tolerance was gone. His body couldn’t handle the amount he took, and he died on that train.
Why Family Education Matters
Unfortunately, Kevin’s story is not unusual. Today, almost every family knows someone who has struggled with addiction or has lost someone to it.
That’s why family education matters.
And why we work with families in a preventative, supportive way.
We teach families about:
- The nature of addiction
- Treatment options
- How to cope with addiction in the family
- How to set healthy boundaries
- How to take care of themselves
Families cannot control another person’s addiction. But they can learn how to respond in healthier, more effective ways.
A New Opportunity for Families
At Starting Point of New Jersey, we are offering a new family education program called “Recovering Together: A Family Learning Experience.”
This six-part series covers some of the most important topics families face, including:
- The Disease Model of Addiction
- Communication and healthy boundaries
- Codependency and family dynamics
- Behavior, self-care, and healing
You Are Not Alone
If you or someone in your family is struggling with addiction, help is available.
You don’t have to face this alone.
We are here to support you.
📞 Call: 856-854-3155
🌐 Visit: startingpoint.org
Brent McNamara, MA, LCADC is a Licensed Clinical Alcohol & Drug Counselor with more than 15 years of professional counseling experience. Specialties include Substance Use Disorder, Christian Counseling, 12-Step Approaches, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, Mindfulness. Brent is celebrating 25 years of sobriety this year. He is married; the father of three beautiful grown daughters and grandfather of six wonderful grandchildren. Brent was born and raised in Upstate New York where he raised and rode horses and enjoyed winter sports. He moved to Philadelphia in 1976 for college. Since then, Brent has become a rabid Philadelphia sports fan. He loves the Eagles, Phillies, Flyers and Sixers. Brent loves cooking Asian cuisine; 3D printing; anything Star Wars related; reading and writing.
